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-Learn Chinese. Obviously this would be the first step in all the world domination plans holding any credibility.
-Record all of Brittany Spears'; songs in Cantonese.
-While waiting for your music to catch on in China, instruct someone to conduct an attempt on the president of the United
States life, and foil the plot as it unfolds in front of him. Stop it before he gets hurt, but after he sees that there was
someone out to get him, and that you saved his life. Forever in your debt (and afraid of getting sued, as you conveniently
claim that he trips you accidentally while you save him, and injure yourself), the president invites you to the White House,
where you meet and make friends with several secret service agents, as well as others highly ranking in the government. You
keep in touch with them and strive to make these relationships strong and lasting. This will come in handy.
-When your music catches on, and you become the idol of pop culture in China, stress to everyone that the only way to
enjoy the music and let it nourish your psyche is to nourish your bodies simultaneously.
-Knowing that 97.6% of people there eat rice daily, you lace the rice reserves with nicotine. As their addiction for nicotine
grows, so will their addiction to your music, by association.
-Introduce repeated phrases into your music such as, You are but peasants (as I once was), but if you follow my ways,
you will become adored in all you do (as I am now) and I will show you the way to being fully satisfied.
-Once you have 1+ billion Chinese, hanging on your every word, and unable to think for themselves, ship them to the United
States, starting with Chinatown, in San Francisco. They will get jobs and work their way up until they become known as the
hardest working cheap labor of auto manufacturing, designer clothing, and peanut butter. Soon you will be in control of Ford,
Liz Claiborne, Tommy Hilfiger, and Skippy.
-They will become the role models of the poor, the downtrodden, and the ignorant, and your following will grow.
-You will then have enough of a following and a cash flow to launch similar campaigns for total domination in other countries.
There will be attacks on BMW, Louis Vuitton, Saab, Toyota, and Swiss Army Knife.
-Once you control all major resources of the free world, let it be known that the only way to make it in this world now
is by working for you, at wages that child-laborers in the 20’s would scoff at. Soon, everyone will be working for
you.
-Once you get enough Yen, Dollars, Pesos, Rubles, and Euros, you buy Australia.
-Run the headquarters of your world wide domination plan from your $1.7 Billion dollar complex above Bondi Beach in Sydney.
Get married. Have a family. Enjoy your private sandy beaches. Why not?
-When you have enough money for several people to live extravagantly for millions of years, pass the industry on to a
trusted and worthy person, with a contract entitling you to 10% of all earnings. Before paying the wages of the laborers,
and before taxes.
It's brilliant.
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